Donna Parker and the Mystery of Arawak (1962)

GUYS! Donna Parker is THE COOLEST! If I'm lyin', I'm flyin'. Behold her girl adventurer life
in all its Kennedy Camelot perfection. Dear Donna, let me be like you! Today, we're bringing you Donna Parker and the Mystery of Arawak, a vintage 1962 girl power guilty pleasure mine and I hope, shortly, of yours.

You might remember my mentioning Miss Parker in passing a couple of months ago, right here, at this very blog location. I made her acquaintance while sidling past two gabbin' ladies digging through a box of discarded books at McKays' (way more gabbing that digging on their parts, which is how I sharked the vintage young adult titles I did end up getting). As I clasped a few musty titles bearing her name to my clavicle, while balancing others from the genre at the knee, while still passing more back to Babu, who was swiftly disappearing under a stack of similar goods, I thought, "Now, I know I know that name from somewhere."

Being just short of a thrift store/rummage sale book HOARDER, slightly more on the collector side but not by much, I've come across my fair share of the forties' through the sixties', plasticized cardboard teen book titles with promisingly colorful covers and yellowed, smudge-inked illustrations every half chapter or so. Needless to say, I love them. What is not to love? Uncle Atom did a great post on these back in January, where I spotted THIS, the exact copy of The Munsters' The Last Resort I left on top of a twelve foot high, home-welded slide at my grandmother's house, in the rain, in the fourth grade, after my mom had specifically told me to be careful with it because the book was old. How I remember that particular book! However dampened my Munster mania by this inadvertent act of destruction and its consequences, I still get a little thrill when I see the stocky shape of one of these type books peeking out of a Goodwill bin or a dusty dresser top at an estate sale. As for Donna Parker and the Mystery of the Arawak-- now, there's a humdinger of one!



Though she never had a TV show, Donna Parker was the star of a seven book run of young adult series titles, published between 1957 and 1964. Author Marcia Martin (real name Marcia Levin... I swear to goodness I need go ahead and get my pseudonym ready... what if fame comes a-knockin?) dragged our dark haired, dark-eyed heroine through many a pint-sized caper, while still managing to be one of the most popular girls at Summerfield Junior High.

Take a look at some of the chapter headings, and tell me you don't think you'd be in for a treat at the onset of this book.



"Midget-sized problems" is especially intriguing. Let's see how the plot unfolds!



Prior to our story, Donna spent the summer, with her best friend Frederica "Ricky" West, as a girls' counselor at Camp Cherrydale (see Donna Parker at Cherrydale, 1957). With Cherrydale fully staffed, and just back from a glamorous summer adventure in Hollywood (see Donna Parker in Hollywood, 1961), the beginning of The Mystery of Arawak has one unhappy junior counselor making the best of things at Camp Arawak. To the left, you can see Donna introduced to the kiddlings by Helene, the senior counselor, "a tall, slender girl with deep set grey eyes, thick black eyebrows, and beautiful wavy black hair." How jealous I used to be of girls in young adult books just based on their Elizabeth Taylor-like descriptions! And she's not even real! At right, Estelle, the saucy camp cookmaster, a little like Audrey Meadows in Pillow Talk in comportment. Top marks.



Sadly, Donna is Ricky-less on this trip. However, we do have distraction in the form of heartthrob Teddy Bair from the boys camp across the lake. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Teddy Bair. Let's let the man himself explain:

"You see, my real name is Thornton, and my last name is Bair. But who would call me Thornton Bair, when Teddy Bair is so much easier to remember? Anyhow, it's kind of got a swing to it... Teddy...Bair..." he said to himself.

Real card, that Teddy character. But I AM stupidly in love with the idea of Teddy as a first name. At left, older girl Kathi (at a time in which that was probably a cute, edgy spelling of that name, before we're just overrun by non-standard lettering) puts on her best cheongsam-inspired dress for a special program put on by the Midgets (which turns out to be the name of the campers group of which Donna is in charge). I'm not going to lie to you, I mainly read the text to find out what's going on in the illustration, and breeze on by, but something went on where older, glamorous Kathi bawled Donna out for not having the kids learn their dramatic league parts on time, or something, and Donna ends up sobbing with shame at her ineffectuality, but gets to stay on anyway. I told you, the illustrations are the main attraction here.

Sidenote1 : Isn't Ricky a cute, cute, cute nickname for a girl? Up there with Frankie as another of my favorite gender bender fifties girl names.

Sidenote 2: Whenever I hear the name Ricky, I immediately think of Amy Sedaris's "imaginary boyfriend Ricky" (always referred to by all three descriptors), and I want to be her. Plain and simple.



At right, Donna's family. Are we seeing the resemblance to Mr. and Mrs. Richard Nixon? Also, note kid brother Jimmy's colored, bunched up socks and sneakers. I want to cop this look. At left, you see Miss Tessie, who runs the camp. I love how even as an adult she has a pinafore with the camp named stitched into it! When I was a Girl Scout counselor, all we had were matching tie-dyed t-shirts we had to wear on certain days. For shame, Camp Sycamore. How perky I could have looked! How much like the much admired Helene!



Exclamations like "Yeeks!" and "Golly!" pepper every other page or so. At one point, someone warns Donna, "That Teddy is poison!", which, did nothing but reduce me to a hysterical fit in reminisce of the Bel Biv Devoe song. Oh, I cannot be contained. Some rustic atmosphere at the small, neighboring town's diner, in the right hand illustration (fly strip! Ew! Ew!), and some kind of camp activity on the left, building sets for the drama thing I was telling you all about earlier.




At left, fellow boy camper Scott looks like he's about 57 years old. At right, my favorite illustration in the book. Doesn't it look the hilt of 1962? There's one guy at the dance named Hascoe Helfenbower, which I found just fascinating. Donna takes a moment of devilry to remark: "Amy's date is sort of short to have such a long name!" Ah, Donna, you sly thing you. Serena and Francine are two other names I noted. I mean, just the living end, right? I love how solid the names sound.



Co-counselor strife, as Helene (who, neither in this illustration nor the other one, really lives up to her Ava Gardner description) angrily packs her things. Turned out she lied on her application and said she was 18, when she was really fifteen. Monstrous! She is SO disqualified as senior counselor! The other photo shows how woefully inept the boys camp is at putting on a decent stage production (though, honestly, I got a good laugh out of it, and what else can you expect from an audience?)



At the costume ball as Alice in wonderland (now, whoever heard of a dark haired Alice? But I guess full-immersion in character wasn't an option) and a scuba diver. Which, is totally what I want to go as this Halloween. If not the Grady twins from The Shining (I was only recently made aware of being in existence when looking for a Shining themed screen print dress... look at this! Now if only I had a twin...), then definitely both Bab and me as scuba men. At right, Donna gives Teddy a piece of her mind. And how!

Hope you liked the Donna experience! Do you have any favorite 60's, teen age book selections I need to keep an eye out for? Lemme hear from you!

Donna Parker website with more info, beautifully laid out, HERE, and I'll leave you with Mr. Valens having a word or two to say about our lovely leading lady. Til next time!

How To Entertain At Home (1952)

Well, bust my buttons! If it isn't the old blogger crowd! How-dee-do? It's been more than a week since I've taken MCM pop culture under the microscope. Between the crazy schedule at the library, marathon viewings of Rupaul's Drag Race (BEST. SHOW.), Wii Fit commitments (29 days straight...and counting! I'm going all Conan the Barbarian on you all), thrift store rounds (mostly successful), and a winning night at Drifter's trivia (team "Touch My Butt" for the fifty dollar gift certificate! What now!), I've been M. and I. and A. But that doesn't mean I haven't still been nosing through fifties' hostess manuals for hot tips... no sir. I submit, for your approval, Today's Woman's How to Entertain at Home, published in 1953.



While I wasn't initially impressed by the cover, the inside of this book proved to be a lavishly illustrated treasure trove of quasi-candid party photos, hints and helps, etiquette to keep in mind... just right up my Eisenhower-influenced alley. I love the subgenre of "You needn't be afraid to throw a party!" hostess literature, because it really does speak to the fundamental fear of those lacking a state representative in the family or a family tree that dates back to "Washington, George"... simply said, "What if I do the wrong thing and people hate it!". The tone of How to Entertain at Home reminded me a little of the indispensible Entertaining is Fun by interior-decorating doyenne Dorothy Draper. The tone of both texts share the constant reassurance that you, the timid hostess, are perfectly capable of throwing a ball or a barbeque, if only you set your heart and mind to making it so. And you follow through with a few helpful guidelines set forth in the text. Cue weeping, thankful me, poring over party set ups while skewering cocktail weenies.

I! Want! To! Be! Unharried! In my regular life as well as in my hostessing duties. Like I said earlier, a lot of the photos, while obviously shot on dummied-up sets in a studio, have realistically non descript models in realistically posed shots. You feel a little like a fifties' fly-on-the-wall in scrutinizing their living rooms.

We get a double shot of this lady's Jane Wyman-esque hair, and I can't say that we are the worse for it. While you check the ice box for more mixers, I'll be admiring your pert neckerchief and pretty white party dress.

In the photograph below, our Wymanite is emptying ashtrays and clearing party clutter in a (probably futile) attempt to nudge guests towards a departure. I always like the last group of people at the party... maybe it's the Rat Pack in me, but the last four or five people to go are usually pretty cool. Like that guy on the right. Get it, with those socks, mister! Get it!

I am deafened to all other commentary by my great and heaping jealousy of this lady's nineteen inch waist, excellent mid 19th century portrait above sideboard, her Sven-lookin', turtlenecked boyfriend, and XXL salad bowl. Where do you store that for occasion in which a mixed salad the size of New York is not necessary? Ah, nuts. To be the people in the book sometimes.

"The host will lose his suavity in the eyes of the guests if the equipment seems to be his master." And how! This "grillmaster" has turned into a smoky mess... sometimes, however, the epic nature of your failure to be master of your own party's destiny, with the right amount of panache and self-deprecation, can actually turn into comedy gold. By the bottom, they seem to have gotten a handle on the situation, and we the viewers are now at leisure to admire the ladies' Mexican skirts. And how!

Below: gonna need that couch. And that op-art skirt. Aaaaand....trade. This illustration reminds you not to let the life of the party turn into the death of the party by letting them go on and on about an uninteresting subject. I've worked hard to become an ace at interjecting to change the subject, coming from a Barbara Walters like- focus on getting everyone involved in the conversation. I've made it part of my life's ambition to make social gatherings just that... SOCIAL. How I hate people to feel shy and unwelcome at a party! And nothing better serves to alienate people at a party than a) cliques of people who know each other only talking to each other about things that only pertain to themselves or b) one person holding forth on a topic that is of interest only to himself, but in that regard, is INFINITELY OF INTEREST to him, and possibly verging on offensive or at the least insensitive to others. Stamp out bad manners, party planners!

Look at the one lonely little placard at stage right. I wonder what it is!



Do you see what I mean about the models looking like regular people for the most part? I'm really into the guy at right's t-shirt, slacks, and sunglasses look. I wonder if this would have looked needlessly casual when readers in the 50's saw it, ie, is this supposed to be an example of a half dressed, sunglasses-on-indoors guy who's bombed on Old Fashioneds, or is he INTENTIONALLY pulling a James Dean and actually looking pretty cool at it? We won't know, I guess.



All the different glasses you need to have a fully stocked set of barware. I have like 14 of these 17 glasses, and how often do I use them? Oh, about twice a never. Plasticware all the way at the parties... I can't have people thoughtlessly breaking my cordial glasses!



My bathroom has this same (I'm assuming) pink tile and black border tile as this bathroom! Also have a little vanity shelf like that. Wish I had the same sink.


Look. At. The. Dress. YES. Dear Lord, make me over as a wasp woman, so I can be my own Amazonian size but still fit into tiny dresses like this. Amen.



"Who do? You do?" the dinner partners seem to be saying to one another. There's that cute dress from above again below at stage left. Taunting.



Cuuuuute.




I always thought patio furniture like this was more of a 70's or even a 90's thing when I see similar sets at estate sales, but lo and behold! Of 1952 vintage, here's a set of wrought iron chairs. REEEALLY need to replace dumpster-dove wicker pieces (which are actually falling apart) out back with a MUCH less unsightly set. These would do! Craigslist, I'm looking at you.



I love the look on the bow-tied man's face. What exactly did the lady in the kerchief (kerchief #2! Yes!) say to be deemed by the author as "in bad taste"? "Have some smokes, Jim." "HOW COULD YOU?!" ((stamps away)).





Remind me to make my own card table over in this one's image at the next party. Could it be prettier? Possibly with the addition of decorative doilies, but just by a hair.


The woman above has surprisingly little hair even for a fifties' person. I wonder if she's the victim of a drastic "chignon"ing or what is going on. Her makeup looks great.

Below, the perfect table setting for me to burst forth with my silver pheasant shaped salt shakers (I have two like this one). Let it roll!



Sandwiches like a song!



As I continue to iterate and reiterate, if you come by my house after 10 pm on a weeknight, you will not be greeted by delicious po' boy sandwiches and hot chocolate. You will probably be greeted by a locked door and a sleeping Lisa. I am sorry for this, but it is the true state of things.





What to commend first? The wallpaper? The sylph like blonde in the cute shorts? The man rocking both a tocque AND a bowtie? Beauty #2's hair? You decide.

So beatnik of that gal to have those cute Carolyn Jones bangs. Do we ever approve.



My bar cart does full-time duty as a shelf to display all the glassware I won't let people use at parties... I really must loosen up a little and let it free! Look how cool this looks!



A girl that looks like someone James Bond would chat up in a bar is talking to the wasp waist woman's boyfriend Sven! Right in front of the 18th century portrait I was coveting earlier! For shame, Sven. For shame.

There is not one thing wrong with this picture. See the great deck chair? The portable cooler chest? The woman at right's perfect hair and family?Later, a swim with the neighbors on vacation. Framable.

I don't know how I feel about cutting out hamburgers as you would biscuits, but there you go.

There's a whole fifty page section on drinks and bartending I was too lazy to post... do I smell a sequel? :)

How's the summer treating you all? Any great party blow-outs to report? Will keep you posted on the hostess brainstorming I do before the hostess BARNSTORMING I do. Ciao for now!